Once Again I’m Right Back at Square One
6 May
Once again it’s been forever since I’ve wrote here. Once again I’m right back at square one (meaning I’ve gained ALL the lost weight plus some back – sigh, hanging my head in shame). Life has been C-R-A-Z-Y. Crazy! There has been some other crap in my life that has needed demanded my attention so this blog and my healthy lifestyle (lack thereof I should say – seems how I haven’t exactly been living one) have been pushed to the back burner.
I am finally starting to get a grip on the other crap that has needed my attention – the key being starting to, it’s still taking a lot of my time, focus and attention – and I’m really beginning to get down on myself about my weight/health. I keep beating myself up that once again (several months ago) I quit. Will I ever stop giving up? Will I ever stop quitting? Don’t I owe it to myself to take care of me, to be healthy?
Yes, I do owe it to myself to be healthy. I do owe it to myself to take care of me. I do owe it to myself to put me first. I know I have to stop giving up. I also know I have to stop beating myself up over all the times I have quit/given up. But it’s really hard not to kick myself when I keep thinking that if I had just stayed the course every one of these times (that I’ve given up/quit) I’d have been at goal weight…not right back at square one (fat, unhealthy, miserable and just plain ole ‘hating life’).
So, with that being said once again I’m back at the beginning and need all the encouragement I can get. I don’t know how I’m going to change all the things I need to change about my unhealthy lifestyle but like the other crap in my life that has been demanding my attention for several months I’m going to do like I have been with that – one day at a time, one minute at a time if need be!
So, I guess it’s really going to be all about baby steps. The first thing I need to work on is the water drinking thing. I’m so addicted to Diet Coke that there are days I go without drinking any water and only DC (like today!). I know that’s super unhealthy so that’s my first goal – to start drinking some water and cut back on the Diet coke.








I hate hate hate having yearly exams done. It’s not pleasant being poked and prodded the way we get poked & prodded during the exam. I have a confession – it’s been over 2 years since I had my last one done. I always use the excuse that I can’t afford to have them done because I don’t have insurance. Yeah, it’s an excuse and a crock of crap. Here in Michigan they have health departments that are very reasonably priced and if you meet certain income guidelines your exams are free. And there are even some doctor offices that work on what’s called a sliding scale fee so they base what you pay on what you make. So the point is – there’s never a reason for me to NOT have a yearly exam done.


