No More Plus Size … eventually

Why can’t things just be easy when it comes to food? Why do I have to be a compulsive eater? Why do I have to be addicted to food? Why can’t I get things under control?

I thought Weight Watchers would help me get a grip. To a certain extent it has. I’m tracking my points which makes me aware of what’s going in my mouth. I’m eating more fruits and vegetables. I’m drinking more water. Those are all things to be proud about.

But I’m still having serious issues with compulsive eating and binging. The last couple days I’ve been saving all my points up to sit and use all those points in one big binge fest.

(more…)

This is me when I don't get food...especially sugar!

… the worse it is.

What does that mean?

The harder I try to be ‘good’ when it comes to food and not binge or eat bad the worse I am!

It’s only 8am and I’ve already had one binge fest today!

I went to bed last night thinking about food as usual but promising myself that today was a new day and I would stop binging, eating junk, etc.

Yeah…that promise got me far. I didn’t even make it 24 hours!

As soon as I woke up I felt agitated, anxious and was craving something sweet and that was at 6am! How can you crave something sweet that early in the morning?

I tried eating eggs…but that didn’t help.

I tried eating a piece of sausage…but that didn’t help.

I saw the containers sitting there on the counter with the chocolate chip and oatmeal raisin cookies my mom just made yesterday. I tried walking away. But I ended up ‘diving’ right in. 6 cookies only left me salivating for more sweets, more sugar, more food But, as soon as I had the first few bites of cookies I wasn’t feeling agitated anymore. I had my “crack” so it took the edginess off…at least for a few minutes.

So here I am blogging in hopes that the cravings will go away but so far it’s not working. Maybe I should just go back to bed and go back to sleep…at least when I’m sleeping I can be good and not eat!

Food addiction – what does it feel and look like?

I had someone ask me (thank you for being honest enough to admit to me that you don’t UNDERSTAND what it is and want to try and understand it):

“I’m not trying to sound rude by asking you this. I just don’t understand and want to know. Will you please explain to me what food addiction feels and looks like?”

Ugh.

That question requires some raw honest truth. I’ve actually had this post in draft mode for several days. I wasn’t sure whether I was going to share with you all what my day as a food addict looks like. I’ve never admitted or shared how much or what I eat. It’s not pretty. Of course, every day is different. Some days I eat more. Some days I eat less. But every day I eat and eat and eat…it never ends.

Before I share the embarrassing truth of just how bad things are, I recently poured my heart out when I wrote food addiction is winning again. That might give you a little insight as to what I’m going through.

So, here goes…

(more…)

I love me some pumpkin pie. As in I could seriously probably sit down with a tub of cool whip, a whole pumpkin pie and eat the entire thing. Ok, well maybe not but I love the stuff!

I don’t know what the points are for a slice of regular pumpkin pie but last night at my meeting a recipe was shared and it sounded delicious so I had to try it and even though I don’t know the points for a piece of the ‘regular’ pie I certainly do know this recipe below is way lower and healthier!

Pumpkin Fluff
1 cup =’s 1 point

Ingredients:

2 packages vanilla sugar free instant pudding
2 1/4 cups skim milk
16 ounce can of pumpkin
1/4 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice
8 ounce tub of fat free cool whip

Directions:

1. Whisk together vanilla pudding and milk until thick (about a minute or so).

2. Add (to the pudding/milk mixture) pumpkin, pumpkin pie spice and fold in cool whip.

Note: I liked it even better today after it sat in the fridge all night and got super chilled.

What’s one of your favorite (healthy) treats during the holidays? Please share!

Hey everyone!

I came to the two places I know I’ll get some great advice – my Facebook page and here. I’m counting down the days (11 to be exact!) until my dad, sister, son and I fly out to Florida! I am so stinking excited thinking that by 1-2 pm on November 20th I will be sitting in the sun, swimming in one of the two pools at Disney’s All Start Sports Resort, unwinding, relaxing, chilling, enjoying family and breathing in Florida air!!!

Hey can you tell I’m just a little on the excited side?

While I’m super excited I’m a little nervous about sticking to a healthy eating plan while there! I have a hard time controlling myself over 2 days on the weekends how the heck am I going to manage 7 days in Florida?

My plan is to utilize the jogging trail they have (it only equals about 1 mile but that’s better than NOTHING!) and to pack some ‘healthy’ snacks. This is where I need your help!

Please leave a comment giving me some suggestions for healthy snacks that can be packed in a suitcase.

Thank you in advance!

When I joined Weight Watchers back in October I decided that I would allow myself one free day a week (Saturday). No writing down what I ate or counting my points. It seemed kind of ‘silly’ because after all the whole WW program is built around the fact that you can eat whatever you want as long as you track the points.

But I wanted one day to not worry about it. One day to feel ‘normal’ and like I had a control on my eating. Do overweight people ever have a control on food? I’m starting to think not…at least for me I don’t!

I made it through the first few weekends doing great allowing myself that free Saturday. I enjoyed indulging in anything and everything. I even found that those first couple Saturdays while I indulged in junk I didn’t over eat. I enjoyed small portions of things and then stopped and got right back on track first thing Sunday mornings.

(more…)

I shared in my Plus Size Bloggers weigh in post for this week that I knew a gain was coming. I didn’t hide the fact that I had a horrible weekend when it came to my eating habits. I pigged out on pizza, bread sticks, regular pop, candy corn and resse’s peanut butter cups (miniature size ones…cause oh ya know if they’re SMALLER then I’m not doing as much ‘damage’ when in reality the smaller they are the more I eat!).

I’ve been doing okay this week but still not eating as healthy as I should be! My son wanted ice cream one day so I took him to McDonald’s thinking I would indulge in a kiddie vanilla cone for 3 WW points. Uhm yeah that did NOT happen! I ended up going with a reese’s mcflurry instead. And do you think it was a small one? Ha, yeah right! It was a medium one! And then I had a slice of Digiornia pizza for dinner one night.

(more…)

It’s so easy to ignore this blog when I’m not completely 100% on board the healthy lifestyle/exercise train…and I haven’t been since Memorial Day Weekend which has been almost 1 full month now.

I feel crappy. I’m tired. I think about food 24/7 again. I eat one meal only to think about when and what the next one will be. I eat crap – fried foods, chips, junk, etc – again all the time. I crave sugar. I’m moody (that has to do with more than just my diet…I have some health issues right now causing my hormones to be all out of whack) and once again I’m finding the only thing that makes me happy is when I’m eating. I pig out in secret – when no one’s around to question or call me out on it.

(more…)

This is what I had for breakfast today. It was super delicious and oh so filling!

Aside from it being super yummy it’s low in Weight Watchers points too. This whole meal was only 7 points.

• 3 egg whites – 1 point (with some green onions & mushrooms)
• cheese – 2 points (it was 3 points for 1 ounce of cheese but I didn’t use hardly any so I figured I’d count 2 points just to be on the ‘safe’ side)
• English muffin – 1 point (used a couple squirts spray butter which is 0 points
• Strawberries – 0 (you can have 8 strawberries for 0 points)
• Cantaloupe – 1

This is my new fave breakfast! I was eating a bowl of Special K or Koshi Go Lean cereal in the mornings – well sometimes. I’m not a huge breakfast person.

I haven’t had a chance to give this recipe a try yet but it sounds really good and it’s only 1 Weight Watchers point.

Bacon Spinach Salad

Makes 4 servings

Ingredients:

4 slices turkey bacon (diced)
1/4 cup white or cider vinegar
8 ounces spinach (coarsely shredded)
5 medium green onions (about 1/3 cup)
2 teaspoons sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon pepper

Directions:

1. Cook turkey bacon until crisp. Stir in vinegar. Heat thoroughly and remove from heat.
2. Add spinach and onions to bacon mixture. Sprinkle with sugar, salt and pepper. Toss 1 to 2 minutes or until spinach is wilted.

Nutrition Information:

Calories               55
Fat                         3g
Saturated Fat    1g
Cholesterol        5mg
Sodium                280mg
Carbohydrate   5g
Dietary Fiber    1g
Protein                3g